When I first thought of doing EMS I thought it would be all car wrecks and heart attacks. You know, stuff u actually need an ambulance for. I had no idea the amount of bullshit people called for.
A common misconception which had never occurred to me before I started this job is that an ambulance is a taxi. Since u don't have to pay for an ambulance immediately people use it all the time to get where they need to go. Or near where they need to go. Assuming it's near a hospital.
And since these people are too cheap for taxis u think they'll pay their ambulance bill? Unlikely.
So let's begin my list of the stupidest taxi calls I've been on recently
10. Man smoked some weed for the first time in years and felt high
---I thought that's what was supposed to happen
9. Woman started her period for the month, her normal monthly period, nothing significant about it
---just a full blown idiot
8. Man couldn't "do anything with" his left forearm.
---now what he wanted to "do" with it I don't really know
7. Woman with a bloody nose, the day before
---your nose is no longer bleeding, what do u want me to do about it?!
6. Woman skipped a day on her antibiotics
---ok, let me run and grab my time machine, be right back
5. Man was blinking in and out
---this is how it was explained and turns out he was just blinking. His eyes.
4. Rats in the house were causing an asthma attack
---I'm not an exterminator
3. Man shit himself so he could go to the hospital and get cleaned up. And get a free milkshake while he was there.
---he never got his milkshake.
2. Kid swallowed a milk dud
---He. Ate. A. Milk dud. Ate it. Nom nom 911!
1. Baby with a tear in it's eye
---well u shouldn't have made your baby so sad then! He was probably
Sad bc he realized your dumb-ass would be raising him.
I'm sure there will be plenty more to come. They call we haul, it ALL.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Lol these still make me giggle
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